In the early 2000's, I attempted several times to establish myself as a professional photographer. My friends and family were concerned with the developing technology on cameras on mobile phones would mean the death of the professional photographer. I even started off leveraging my photographic retouching skills that I had learned and practiced with my mentor, Juan Aguilera.
And so I attempted to grow of Keeping Digging Workshop, which was the first incarnation of photography, video, and music for several years.
During those early years, the exponential pace at which mobile phones did to develop their camera technology, basically meant the death of the professional photographer - like myself.
Once I was playing a more active role with A Amore' Events & Entertainment, the role of photographer on events diminished. The demand for Master of Ceremonies (MC), Disc Jockey (DJ), Host, and Ordained Minister was more so than the professional photographer - at least for me. I re-imaged my burgeoning business to Keep Digging Media after being hired as a wedding photographer for a friend-of-a-friend's.
That would be my last and final gig as a photographer. I didn't realize it was my death of the professional photographer! It saddened me greatly to see my camera and gear that I spent a large amount of money into to placed into a closet never to be touched again for professional (paid) use.
I was sad because I realize, right then and there, that I wasn't good enough to be a photographer that was paid for my craft. And no, I didn't blame camera phones. It was a lack of talent in a pool of photographers - I resigned myself to the death of the professional photographer.
I honestly thought I was great, especially with the encouragement of friends, and family plus being featured in a gallery at the local Tully's Coffee store in Issaquah. It wasn't enough!
Then I became angry, and resentful of my life choices that I made to be a professional photographer. The time, and energy, and especially the money and resources I spent attempting to be a success professional photographer. I thought would attempt to be stock photo photographer instead; didn't produce enough images to be paid. I morphed into a portrait photographer for high school senior, head shots for upcoming actors and models, and other related photos - too much competition for that type of business.
To better resign myself to the death of the professional photographer, I stopped mentioning I did any photography. It made me cry inside. I really did love photography.
Nowadays I take solace in the occasional praise I receive online from my social media posts of photos I capture on my iPhone with "great shot". With all of that said, I'll be selling most of my gear as you usually do once someone in your life (or something) passes on and you no longer have a use for anymore.
The final step in the death of the professional photographer within me: acceptance.
This has been my C Note.
'los; out
Comments
Post a Comment