The Sapphire Sled

The Washington State Department of Licensing reminded me via email that my vehicle license tabs are due in … 3 months from now. Fascist asshats! You’ll get my cheddar when I’m … OH!

I digress.

Can you believe that my arctic blue 2004 Acura RSX Type S has been in service for 10 years? Following my naming convention for inanimate objects in my possession, I dubbed the car the Sapphire Sled after several name considerations.

In addition, I wanted to personalize the license with a vanity plate. I only remember the last two candidates:

 

SOMONEY
LOS

I landed on LOS for a multi-layered joke to the world. You see, I thoroughly enjoy entertaining the world while simultaneously raising the highway salute to those that don’t “get it”. LOS is my nickname from my family and close friends. Short for Carlos. What you might’ve missed is the word “LOS” is Spanish for “the”. Therefore LOS on a car is hilarious to me.

Or … CAR, another name for automobile, motor vehicle, etc., and the LOS. Or ‘los is in the car. I could go but I won’t.

My hope that with enough marketing, backstory, and whatnot that my ride would gather the notoriety of the Millennium Falcon ala  Star Wars fame!

Over the years, I’m confident that my car is synonymous with me. Win for me! It’s so synonymous with me that when a different pilot is seen behind the wheel, it’s reported as soon as possible to me.

For example, I was out of country for a week. Dad was living with me, and needed a more reliable set of wheels than the dying Ford Escort. I loaned it to him. The reports I received upon my return varied between these.

• “LOS! I think your ride has been stolen.”
• “I almost called the police, ‘los. Some old guy was driving your ride. Did you have work done to it and they were road testing it?”
• “I’m pretty sure, not totally sure it was your car but I think someone else has a twin of your car.”

Those are the top gems, that I can recall as I’m writing this blog entry.

In fact, I’ve recalled the pilots and passengers of the SS. The co-pilot seat has been filled hella times, but the pilot’s list is short but distinguished list, at least as far as I can remember:

·         Charrina Bayne

·         Charlie Bayne

·         Scott Gruenich

·         Jason Escherich

·         Cheyanna Flower

If I forgot you, I apologize! I don’t trust many people to zoom around in my 6-speed manual transmission blue rocket. And by most people’s admission, they don’t want to drive it either!

It’s been the centerpiece to many of my road rallies, or road trips to around the country, and even out of country! It’s been in several exciting adventures with my friends and family. I’m quite proud of it too. I continue to tinker with it by customizing the wheels, brakes, paint, and interior.

I’ve long desired to upgrade the engine package beyond what I rolled off the showroom floor as stock. A complete turbo kit and accessories to rend out every horsepower possible.

Yet despite all of this, if the Sapphire Sled and I were to be severed – I won’t need therapy for my loss. 10 years is a long time to be with a piece of equipment. In its tenure, I’ve also nuked an engine. Poor, poor SS.

That said, she still is my little princess. With her expensive gasoline, her synthetic oil that costs a king’s ransom, and won’t even launch into the detailing bills I pay, I still love it.

How do I know?

When I’m having a craptastic day, and want to escape my own life and world, I grab my keys, Mark IV, and Lucky. I turn on the Sapphire Sled, slip into the plush leather pilot’s seat. Queue some road rally playlist on Mark IV which instantly synchronizes with the radio. Place Lucky [my iPhone 5] into a holder as that synchronizes with the Sapphire Sled.

I gently put her into gear, and guide her out to I-90 Eastbound. Needles up, gas pedal down, y’all! I just blast down the road with the heat coming outta my speakers in the nightscape. A Cherish grin starts to appear on my face that’s cloaked in darkness.

That’s how I know!

This has been your C Note.

‘los; out