C Note(s)

In another step to improve on myself, i.e. keep digging, I quietly made a New Year’s resolution to learn to forgive the people I don’t currently interact with anymore. In order to do that, I sought out what is forgiveness and then I can begin to learn how to do it. Apologies in advance, ‘cause it’s gonna be perceived as preachy!  But this is only my rhetoric, pay no mind to it.  “Forgive, and forget”, right? Wrong! Forgiveness can lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the ones who hurt you. Forgiveness doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. I know that my anger towards these folks resides in a crucible of hurt, betrayal, confusion and frustration. Hurt  – This person / these people hurt my feelings. Betrayal  – This person / these people misused my trust in them. They lied to me with a...

WCP posted on her Facebook Wall a link to a blogger named Heidi Priebe and her Thought Catalog. Charrina has a tendency to follow the same guidelines that I do … 1) revelance – to me, the situation, or time 2) thought provoking for myself and/or others 3) is it progressive – will it help anyone including myself. After reviewing it, and overanalyzing it, I am writing about it now. I comment after a paragraph or two, so the notation is HP = Heidi Priebe, CB = Carlos Bayne (yours truly) The Truth About Meeting Someone At The Wrong Time By Heidi Priebe HP: Timing is something that none of us can seem to get quite right with relationships. We meet the person of our dreams the month before they leave to go study abroad. We form an incredibly close friendship with an attractive person who is already taken. One relationship ends because our partner isn’t ready to get serious and another ends because they’re getting serious too soon. CB:  Tragically, I relate to all of t...

C Note(s), January Joiners to February Failures. This morning I popped my head into the Costco Corporate Gym as I have done on and off for the past decade or so. Every January for the past 10, it's been the same. Many new faces that I haven't seen, all using the cardio equipment. UGH. January Joiners! That yearly resolution to exercise more, eat healthier, and more. By February, they'll have tapped out - February Failures. Most have unrealistic expectations. Alas, another discussion for another time.    One might say that's a cynical comment, but I have ten years of unwavering data and experience. They clog my gym for a month, and only for a month. So I jetted outside armed with Mark VI, the Nike+ app, and my new running kicks. It was bitter cold outside, but not as cold as my ex-wife was in bed. Zing! I dialed in 30 minutes, pressed play and set off into the wild world of sports. [35 minutes later] After bombing around Issy, the electronic female voice states, "Co...

Man, I’m frustrated that it’s come to this. My chronicling of my life is summarized in an annual review. Sigh. Such a decline from the daily to once a week to deteriorate to monthly to … this. Maybe it’s a product of my ever-increasing daily life bullying my energy and time to do it? Perhaps it’s simply not focused on that aspect because I’m living the experience instead? Or a little of both? Regardless, 2014 A.D. was a year of personal growth, with seasons of love in all it’s facets. As always, it didn’t play out the way I thought it would. January Ø   Quietly welcomed the new year with friends and family in Portland, OR. Ø   Paid my respects to Washington State Trooper Mike Buckingham. Even though I never met the man, I know his loved ones he left behind for which I showed my love and support for them in their time of grief. Ø   Enjoyed a 2 nd Christmas with Cindy Buckingham. Ø   Hosted one last themed party at the apartment at Highlan...

The female electronic voice from iPod (Mark VI) earbuds fills my head. "Congratulations, you've completed your 30 minute run." Her words trail off into the early morning darkness near the Costco Wholesale Corporate Lake as I remove them. The metrics are nothing to write home to Jesse James Wise about. Or any other of my fitness freak friends (said with all the love in my heart, by the way) But it's a record for me. Since you don't my history, then you don't understand the impact. I snicker as the tsunami of memories flood my mind with memories from long ago. Why do I run? Because I wasn't competitive or talented enough for ball sports (e.g. football, basketball) or stick-and-ball sports (e.g. baseball, softball, lacrosse) Mind you, I could play and capable enough. I wasn't never good enough for coaches to accept me after tryouts. So I ran, and ran fast. Like the wind! Finally, something I can do and do well. Propel myself through a variety of terr...