Skip to main content

Happy Mother's Day

Carina Muldez Bayne
02.02.48 - 12.17.97

Happy Mother's Day to all those mothers out there. Especially to the ones I know: Alicia Ulrich, Ashley Smith, Audrey Escherich, Phyllis Lines, Carrie Buckel, Catherine Rocha, Chandra Martinez, Cheryle Still, Cheyanna Flower, Cindy Buckingham, Cristina Waters, Danielle Dawn, Ginny Hoyt, Gretchen Maliska, Heidi Vazquez, Janelle Rees, Jo Rorberg, Renee Payne, Josie Powers, Julie Gish, Tammy Escherich, Kristine Santiago, Luz Bayne, Mari Odette-Kanotz, Maria Chieruzzi, Traci Briggs, Megan Lovett, Rachelle Maurer, Renee Prengel, Sami Smith, Shyla McKinzie, and Sidney Nettleton. If I forgot someone, I do apologize! It's an extensive list so please know you should be on it.

My mom? Greatest woman I ever met. Although, I didn't realize it until after her passing. It's not like I wasn't grateful, proud of her, honored her, and more, I didn't realize it was the tallest order for me to locate yet another woman like her. Especially when I use her as the measure of things that are awesome.

Why do you think I still write 'open letters' to her even though she's been gone for 17 years? In the hopes, she'll read it or hear it in heaven and take action? Um, no. Are you crazy? It's an expression for me to seek solace in the knowledge that if she 1) was alive 2) and used the internet that she might answer me.

I loved her. Not as a momma's boy, but as a son should. She was a daughter, sister, wife, mother, and friend to many. I could only try to be half of that! And be as loved back by so many. Were those days that she's completely frustrated me? Infuriated? You bet! At the end of the day, she still was my mom, so yeah you forgive and forget.

I hope she's proud of the man I am as of now (never know about the future) I am certainly more confident about fulfilling my promise I made her on her deathbed. More so than last year, and definitely more than I was 21.

This Mother's Day has been more brutal to dig through than other years, not gonna lie. Usually I'm cool for school, but some years, it's tough. This is one of those. And this Sunday, I miss our Sunday ritual a ton...

Mom and I would post up at the kitchen table. Dad and Charrina still asleep. She'd make coffee, I would fetch the Sunday newspaper outside. I already dressed up for my job as a supervisor for Thrifty Payless Drug Inc.

I would read the Sports section first, Mom the Front Page, in silence. Comfortable silence. We wouldn't remark about our thoughts, and opinions on what we were reading. We would exchange sections that are read, until we have read thoroughly the newspaper. Afterward we would casually talk about the upcoming day for a few minutes but usually cut short by my commute time to my craptastic job.

We wouldn't say goodbye, either. We exchange I love you's, and hugs. She knew I loved her, and I knew she loved me, and it was just understood - nonverbal communication.

We would depart by saying until next time.

Indeed, Mom.

Until next time we meet. Hopefully it'll be on a Sunday morning, would love to read the newspaper with you again.

This has been my C Note.

'los

Comments

  1. 'Los, this brings a tear to my eye both in sorrow and joy. Mama Carina was an amazing women, especially to have raised two extraordinary children. No, I never met her but my instincts are usually pretty good. Knowing you as I do, part of why you are the wonderful man that you are today is due to their guidance. I believe you were blessed with wonderful parents. Your father and mother truly left a foundation of heart and lessons to live your best life. I am sorry she is not physically here but I believe she is in spirit...with you all the time. I hope when you share Sunday, tomorrow, with your dad & Charrina, you have a great time together remembering your mama. :) Thank you for your touching story. Luv you....C

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Let's Dance

The other week, I was driving to my 2 nd job at Malarky’s Sports Grill. Wednesday to be exact. I noticed a man standing at a bus sign waiting for a bus. I recognized the man right away. It was Kenny, The Dancing Wild Man of Factoria. It’d been a minute since I’ve seen him on the streets of Issaquah, I was growing concerned that something awful happened to him. I was thankful to find him once again, and within the same area I “met” him the first time… hilarious story. I remember distinctively. It was my first summer I spent in Issaquah. The sun was out, so relatively warm. I was bombing around in the Sapphire Sled [an arctic blue, 2004 Acura RSX Type S] with the windows down, the tunes up. I was stopped at the traffic light on the corner of Front Street and NW Gilman Blvd; the busiest intersection. From out-the-cuts, I heard someone screaming! I pull off my shades immediately. I whip my head around trying to seek out the source of the noise. I turn down the radio as I desper...

Manic Monday, Terrible Tuesday, Wonderful Wednesday, Throwback Thursday, and Finally Friday

What a roller coaster week I have had! To start off the week was a manic Monday. After work on Monday , I did a WinCo run with WCP. Always entertaining. Tuesday was terrible. Started off by being tardy for work, so I treated myself to Tully's before posting up. And... in my experience, when you start off a day like that, any attempt to speed up or make up that half-step, half-tick, never happens. For inexplicable reason, you are now out-of-step with the Universe, and like fucking hell you're gonna make it back up. Never. Fails. I was late to meetings, I was late to a gym class I'm regularly early for, and the list goes on. In fact, I decided on that day instead of seeking out my dream girl of a svelte body, superior intelligence, endless energy, and with a litany of characteristics to make any fairy godmother proud I made the wide-sweeping declaration that I wanted this instead. A 2-ton, yoga pants wearing, 45 year old, bitter, divorcee that is one more named cat f...

Cinematic Carlos - Seattle International Film Festival 2014

Last night started the 2nd year of my annual tradition (?) of screening several movies during the Seattle International Film Festival. I've known about for years, even a short stint in managing travel during the 2001 SIFF (that's even a longer story!) However, I had zero to little interest in it. I had no good reason either way. Last year, my dear friend, Cindy, invited me to be her movie buddy for SIFF. I accepted because I had no honestly good reason to refuse. We ran around the city tracking down movies that we wanted to watch, others were forgettable but that's the point! Some of these films will hit the mainstream. Most do not. Through the movies, misadventures, and mischief, we had a blast. So, it goes without saying, she invited me to repeat the feat. It continues to teach me: Despite how 'busy' you are - slow down and cherish the time with friends, family, and loved ones That as you grow older - invites should bear more weight than when you were y...