- Mood:
Outraged - Listening to: my iPod [on all song shuffle]
- Reading: PSA Journal [October issue]
- Eating: Corndogs and corn
- Drinking: Edelwiess
I'm so fucking pissed off!! Jesus christ I hate the game. I know, I KNOW... "Don't hate the playa, hate the game." Aiight, done and done. On Friday, an old skillet of mine holla'd at me. Granted I had nothing else to rock up, but I knew the ONLY reason why he did. You see, my best friend (g-MONEY) volunteered to babysit his g/f's little girl so his g/f and John's g/f can attend an Air Supply concert. [And no, don't get me started about?!] That left John open. It was great, really. Ate steaks, got tore up from the floor up on beer, smoked like chimneys, and watched movies I hadn't seen. Then Saturday I planned on setting up my wireless router so I can rock up the internet in my bedroom instead of the Dale Earnhardt Suite which I feel so dirty when I'm posted up there w/ my iPod blazing 'cause she's talking to that db of a b/f. My neighbor / friend, Brandon was working away. I didn't have anything else going on which pissed me off to no end BTW. So I kicked it w/ him all day. The night time activity was kicking it at the local bar. The only women I can seem to attract are 3 or 4s. FOR FUCK'S SAKE!! Would it be too much of a miracle to ask for a 7,8,9,or 10 to be interested in me? Long story made short [too late, I know] My wingman and myself left w/o any BTs. I tried engaging one BT by myself w/ 2 CBs. Now I'm usually pretty good w/o a wingman... but one was a Broomhilda, and the other was a Den Mother. Shot down in 30 seconds, but not before I dissed all three of them on the dance floor of which I heard several peeps laughed. We roll on to Sunday. Woke up late in the day, w/ a hang over. I called, text, and email my crew to watch a movie w/ me [Eagle Eye] No one heeded the shout outs, so I went by my oneies. SWCNBN asked me if I could buy her a bag of popcorn w/ her cheddar. No worries, I was gonna be there anyways, right? I watched Eagle Eye, thinking these 2 principle characters have these mundane lives much like myself and yet they find themselves thrust into this incredible adventure of action and intrigue. Then I just started hulking out! The culmination of no hits on POF, the office girlies were blacking me out, the world just seemed to have it in for me. That being the case, I was going to drive my fucking sled that I love so dearly off the bridge. Fuck it. But life is funny that way. When you're awesome, and loved by many... they just won't let you go easily. So I got thumblashing on text, yelled at by another on the same celly, and finally a stern lecture about my tattoo as to why I should keep digging. By the time Monday rolled in, I was still tripping and hulking out. My friend / hair sytlist talked to me and had dinner. That seemed to have done the trick. I realized that the biggest item she took wasn't my soul, heart or trust. It was my self-confidence. It finally dawned on me that Brian was right. The single, most powerful weapon in my arsenal was my self-confidence. And now, I'm working on rebuilding that stronger and better than before.
Until next time, keep digging.
'los with the most
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