C Note(s)

I really shy away from saying goodbye. There's finality that leaves an icky feeling in my heart and soul. However, today, I said goodbye to my old "home" at Highlands at Wynhaven. As I was dropping off my keys and whatnot, I ran up on the head maintenance guy and his trusty wingman / sidekick. Those boys were the bomb! Any maintenance request I submitted was addressed immediately, and without complaint. Granted I didn't do often, I honestly assessed it. The best or funniest story that I have about us is this: One innocuous Monday morning, I was four-wheelin' hella as I woke up. I jumped into the Sapphire Sled from stall #45 with gym bag and messenger bag. As I crept up to the automated garage door, I stopped too close to it. As the door hit my license plate holder, it jumped off the track! FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! I hopped out. I tried lifting the gate enough to put in on track; literally. Not one inch. Awesome. Then the other residents of J building started th...

The other week, I was driving to my 2 nd job at Malarky’s Sports Grill. Wednesday to be exact. I noticed a man standing at a bus sign waiting for a bus. I recognized the man right away. It was Kenny, The Dancing Wild Man of Factoria. It’d been a minute since I’ve seen him on the streets of Issaquah, I was growing concerned that something awful happened to him. I was thankful to find him once again, and within the same area I “met” him the first time… hilarious story. I remember distinctively. It was my first summer I spent in Issaquah. The sun was out, so relatively warm. I was bombing around in the Sapphire Sled [an arctic blue, 2004 Acura RSX Type S] with the windows down, the tunes up. I was stopped at the traffic light on the corner of Front Street and NW Gilman Blvd; the busiest intersection. From out-the-cuts, I heard someone screaming! I pull off my shades immediately. I whip my head around trying to seek out the source of the noise. I turn down the radio as I desper...

Mom. Yo, we gotta talk. Or rather I write and you read / listen / whatever angels do. I want to discuss one of current missions: Get Los A Girl. First, accolades / props / high fives to the effort and the girls and women you've introduced to my life. Definitely an upgrade to the whorebags that feigned interest in me while cheating on me or the douche baguettes that crammed me in the FriendZone to languish and die. I invited them to skip hand-in-hand off the fucking planet but they didn't RSVP. Pity. AHEM! I digress. Again thank you for the girls and women that are enthralled with me, love me, think I'm amazing. Kudos to you! I'm grateful - I am! However I don't think I was specific enough. In fact if you ask my friend / mentor / boss Mari she'll tell me I'm not manifesting this correctly (more about that later) Momma - I need those same types of girls (under 30) and women (30 +) who are 1) not lying whorebags 2) interested in me 3) not crazier th...