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Showing posts from 2014

Spontaneity, Serrated Knife and a Surprise

  Got your attention, huh? I love piquing a reader's interest on title alone. My creative writing teacher always barked that the 'title is vital'! So. At my place of work, a property that we partner with donates annually a GINORMOUS gingerbread house. And each year there's a silent auction for it once it's close to Christmas which the money is given to Children's Hospital. Without thinking it through thoroughly, I placed my bid for it! Yup. I done did it without a plan (kinda scary but fun at the same time) I didn't I would win with my bid so I put it out of my mind. This afternoon it was announced that I won via a company-wide email. My heart sank. I'm ill prepared to transport my prize. I started formulating a battle plan on the fly... In the meantime, employees that don't usually speak to me were emailing, calling or stopping by in person with two questions on their mind. How was I transporting it? Where was I transporting

Christmas - My Only Wish

RE: C Note(s) Christmas - My Only Wish   Hey Mom,   I only have one wish for Christmas this year. To love Christmas as much as you did, and for the same reasons.    I’m confident I know why you loved the Christmastime so much when you were with us. Speaking of ‘with us’, can you believe that it’s been 17 years since your soul has been upgraded to another plane of existence? I’ll digress briefly on this tangent but I’ll get back on point soon.   I remember the first Christmas you were not with us, because you had left days before. The feeling of sadness hovered over us as we struggled with our individual feelings of loss, in addition to the group vibe. I was still shell-shocked that my brain didn’t process that you were gone. I fulfilled the role of Santa Claus by passing out the small amount of gifts under the plastic Christmas tree that we would put up every year.    For the years that followed, I upheld all the Bayne Christmas traditions. I started playing music on December 1 st , an

Home, Sweet, Home

The following is the journal excerpt from my 2006 experience of a sudden ice storm that paralyzed the Seattle area for one night... Below is the excerpt from my journal regarding my almost 20 hour (19hrs 56mins) odyssey from Costco Travel (Issaquah) to my home (Bothell) and the 26 miles that separate it... "Home, Sweet, Home" November 27th 2006 [430p] Left work to start my commute home. Since it had rained/snowed earlier I knew my traffic would be delayed. I just didn't realize what the Gods of Lunacy had in store for me... [630p] Two hours into my usual 1.5 hour, I was near  160th St  SW on I-405 NB. I sat there for 15 minutes w/ no movement. I made the fateful call to bail off the freeway and brave the surface streets to home. Now to fully appreciate the situation, you must know that accessing Bothell from the Woodinville is like connecting via Hong Kong on a Seattle-Los Angeles flight. It was dark, cold and starting to freeze the water on the roadway. I started to make

L.O.K.I. - Lord Over Knowledge and Information

It took me some time but I settled on my name for my iPhone 6. Since Siri is Scandinavian in origin, I researched Norse history and culture. And I also thought about famous artificial intelligences in movies.  Can you add to the lis t? Sharon Apple (Macross Plus) Deus Ex Machina (The Matrix) HAL 9000 (2001: The Space Odyssey) VIKI (Eagle Eye) Skynet (Terminator) So I named it Loki, the Norse God of mischief. Since I was still gunning for artificial intelligence, I converted it to an acronym: L ord O ver K nowledge and I nformation  I wondered if there's a difference between knowledge and information. Apparently there is a difference. Knowledge is what you know as an individual. Information is facts, stats, opinions, other people's knowledge.  So there you have it. L.O.K.I. it is!  This has been your C Note. 'los; out 

Open Letter To Mom

Hey Mom, It’s Los again. Been a minute since I’ve wrote you, and that’s using the term liberally. The world hasn’t gone to hell-in-a-hand basket, yet, so I’m still digging. The last letter I wrote was born out of frustration, hurt, and anger. I thought I would mix it up 10 months down the line with positive energy. Met a woman, Mom. Her name is Cher. She is also a mother of two daughters. She’s half-Filipino with her mother being the full-blooded Filipino. We had a similar upbringing so reminiscing about you has energized memories of you. It’s a compliment, trust me. I’m absolutely convinced you would love her as much as I do. Sadly, I realize that without your passing it wouldn’t have been the catalyst which led me to Cher.  Such is life.  Speaking of life, we’ve been together for a scant 5 months but it seems like we’ve known each other our entire lives. Until I looked at the calendar, I didn’t realize that it’s actually less time on the boards than I thought. Time is

Super Woman - Cher

For months now, I've been receiving compliments about my girlfriend, Cher, how we are treating our relationship in terms of social media, and how I've developed in terms of dating. I always feel awkward receiving props about the looks another person. I didn't play a role in creating the beauty that she is, I won't take credit for like building her like a robot in my non-existent garage, and frankly kinda surprised she choose me! So I smile and reply, "Thank you so much. I'll be sure to pass that on to her." Now then as far as our relationship. Not that I needed to be reminded of this, but I was ... be sure to keep the special tender moments to ourselves, or closed door conversations remain closed door conversation. Translation? Don't put your troubles on 'Broadcast News' such as Facebook, or shame your partner. Or on the flip side don't overly gush about this and that that pertains to your beau. I have new girlfriend, but I'm no

Daddy Dearest

So. My Dad quietly slipped off into the night towards the Philippines last night without a ton of fanfare than he did 7 years ago. In fact, the mood was somewhat anti-climactic and a grip somber, without being depressing. Almost a methodical approach to it all.    I’m still processing his departure, actually. 90% of the time, this man drives me nuts! I assumed it’s penance paid for raising Charrina and I during the 80’s. Now that I’m his adult-child it’s time for him to regress into this role? I dunno. In the end, he’s still Daddy Dearest, whether he’s here or there.    Regardless, he’s still my Dad. And I’ll still miss him dearly! I won’t miss my high-stress, high frustration level, though. I love him, but damnit… Which segues to my ‘new’ role. Granted I’ve been acting like a ‘dad’ for my father since my mom passed away. So, I’ve had almost 20 years of experience. However, over the weekend, and this morning, my role of acting like a dad has transitioned to being a Dad.    There is a d

Slogan So What?

"Be Prepared" is the Boy Scouts motto. I would hazard a guess a fair amount of people know this. What's not so known is the Boy Scout Slogan. "Do A Good Turn Daily" When I first read that in my BSA Handbook I had no idea what it meant. My Dad fully explained it to me as young boy. My reaction was priceless, according to my Dad. Me: "That's ridiculous! What do I get outta helping someone or doing something nice and positive for someone else everyday?" Dad: "Nothing but the satisfaction of helping, sonny boy. It'll make the world a better place. Especially if everyone did it, not just Boy Scouts of America." Me: "Rubbish, I say." Dad: "Well?" Me: "Well what?" Dad: "Well are you going to do it?" Me: I grumbled. "Yeah, I'll do it." And I've been doing it every day since then for the past 25 years. That's about 9, 125 turns. Not every turn was obvious or pres

"Lucky" Is Still Lucky - For Now

The microwave version / elevator speech version: I ordered a 64GB iPhone 6 today. The 'War and Peace' edition right here. Read more ... I usually don't treat myself until it's absolutely necessary or apparent. From shoes to computers to cars. When I do, I drop top dollar (mad cheddar) on the best value for the equipment based on my intended use and/or longevity of it. American society become an easily consumable and disposable culture. But I'm old school, raised old school, and probably continue to operate that way. Take for my example my current phone, 16GB iPhone 5 (no C or S), that I call "Lucky". How I named is even a longer story! And for another time. I purchased it after I lost my Galaxy S phone in the world record setting snowball fight. It's EPIC way to lose a phone, might I add. I didn't have insurance; only the warranty. Which meant I was on the hunt for a new handset. The iPhone 5 was trumpeted as the best of all time. I had alr

A Decade of Digging - Gym Class Hero

HM. I’m nearing my 10 th  anniversary of digging at the gym, which I typically call it, ‘Gym Class Heroes’ action. Generally confuses everyone, which is fine with me. I’m almost 39 years old, and I remember when I was 29 …   It was 2005. I was barreling down my dirty thirties. My co-workers and friends who were already in their 30’s were in the best shape of their lives. At least from my perspective. And here I was in the worst shape of my life. Now then, I was still killing burgers, brew, and quad-mochas like they were going out of style. I knew deep down I needed to take action then, or I’m doomed to fitness failure later in my life.   And I promised myself I wouldn’t be.   I don’t make promises that I don’t keep, especially to myself! I sought out assistance, and through a complicated, even longer story, I met up Ken Lipparelli. Or Big Kenny as the gym rats would call him. I approached with my fitness goals, and how I thought they could be met. He smiled with that tolerant yet you-c

FORE!!

Golf is a seductively frustrating sport to be played recreationally. This was never more apparent to me than this weekend. I smashed it up with the White River Golf Club at the two courses at Suncadia Resort in Cle Elum. You see, my co-worker / bro, Ron, invited me to be his +1 for this two-day tournament. As of the invite, I hadn't been to Suncadia and always wanted to go. When I'm assigned to a group on any golf course, I'm asked the usual housekeeping questions. Have you played here before? What are you hitting today? How long have you been playing? And do you have a handicap? I answer the questions - Yes/No, Callaway, not long enough and yes, 35. My handicap is usually met with an eyebrow raise (34.9 is high) I follow up with that I recognize that it's high but more trips golfing would remedy it. I called golf seductively frustrating because I'll crush a ball off the tee by promptly hooking my second shot into the damn woods! It's shit like th

Been Caught Kaepernicking

Not as much fun or as funny as the Jane’s Addiction song, “ Been Caught Stealing ”, but at least caught your attention. This morning I decided to do interval cardio work since I had weight training / core muscular workout yesterday morning. Mentally I was prepared for P90X + with good old Tony Horton, but I discovered someone had errantly forgotten a T-25 Focus, core cardio, Beta (2 nd level) in the DVD drawer. SWEET! I’ll do that. Then eventually other gym users posted up, and I found myself on display for the next 22 some odd minutes. Reminds of the time I was ‘caught’ Kaepernicking… A few weeks ago, I had a cut on the lower portion of my right elbow, very close to the triceps muscle. With iPod in (Mark V), and workout clothes, I started my weight workout. Now you have to appreciate that my corporate gym is expansive, and each wall is lined with mirrors. I accidentally brushed my cut against the Smith machine. I immediately wanted to look at it. The only way to do that

A Bayne-full Bad Day

So. Most my reading audience is my crew, my family, and my co-workers. They realize I don't engage in any activity only to do the minimum amount of work necessary, half-ass it, or to have sloppy results. Bad days are no exception! After a late night of doing laundry, I woke up this morning. What I didn't realize was I was waking up into a Bayne bad day … the Sapphire Sled [2004 arctic blue Acura RSX Type S] was so low on car juice, that she wouldn’t turn over for me.    I have no gas can, either. Hauled ass to the nearest gas station; ARCO - AM/PM. To the dismay of the clerk that I’ve seen a billion times before, he looked at the 1 gallon gas can I placed on his counter. I requested a little less than a gallon of gas on a pump. He shook his head, immediately realizing how my morning was going. He quipped, "$3.00 of gas on pump 3. Good luck, buddy."   After damn-near being ran over in the Safeway parking lot, I walked back triumphantly with my tale-te

Watershed Withdrawals - Just Press Play

My bro, Jason, always has con depression after NORWESCON or ECCC etc. While I did sympathize with the man, I didn't fully empathize with him either. Until now... By 11am today, in my mind, I should've been at least 6 beers down instead of thinking how hangry I was as I barreled into my lunch time. By 5pm, I was thinking, where is the effing schedule so I can plan my night.  UGH. Last night I created a Watershed 2014 playlist for Mark V (5). I didn't realize I was gonna have a watershed moment at work. Being 'plugged in' all day, everyday is a CLM with our AGMM. So there he sat all day in my bag.  I started cranking up the tunes leaving the parking lot to my date. Only Model Michelle, Great Gary, and WCP will find this hilarious but... Party in the USA was blasting out the Sapphire Sled's speakers.  Since I'm experiencing Watershed Withdrawals, I'll just press play to have all those memories flood my mind like it was yesterday. Oh, hold da door - it was.

Busy Bayne

Over the weekend, at my gig, I encountered someone I have not seen in years. He smirked, "I see that you're busy as always. Don't you ever grow tired of it?" "No, sir. In fact, the one main reason why I stay so busy," I replied. "Oh? What's that?" "In the wake of mother's death, it reaffirmed something I innately knew - I read it off of a motivational poster but apply it daily. The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose. 'sides, there are fringe benefits, too." "Really," he answers. He presses, "Which are?" "One, you are rarely bored, have a dull moment, and don't have to search for adventure. Two, you socialize with many but different people, ideas, groups, and activities. That's a plus because we are humans, and part of the human condition is to socialize. BOOM, done. Three, necessity is the mother of invention. You need to be organized to be this busy to make it work effectiv

Cynical Carlos - Love, Dating, and Relationships

HM. Here's a fun fact. In the 9 year history of this blog, I've posted 112 times. Of those, 13 of them are of love, dating, and/or relationships. That's about 11%, folks. Since April I haven't posted about any of this, I'm overdue. Mark V [my 5th named iPod] randomly played Theory of a Deadman's, "Bad Girlfriend". I absolutely love it, much to the ire of my friends and family. All on the cusp of my wedding DJ gig this upcoming weekend. I'm not a fan of dating, but alas a necessary evil, in order to find what I'm looking for. Honestly, I don't think I'm very good at romantic relationships. Even with a 'starter marriage', on my life's resume, plus relationships after I've healed... still not ready, or good at it. One would purpose that I am awesome at it. I've been dating since my divorce in 2008. Have had a few relationships since then, none of which were tenable. All while my friends are doing the same. Some g

One Nation. One Team. One Tribe.

  One nation. One team. One tribe. I'm not certain why this edition of World Cup is so captivating with the Seattle area but I'm loving it! The casual viewer / fan is hitting me up about their questions to which I answer with the thought it'll encourage them to learn more and learn to love the 'world's sports'. Seriously it's a sport that needs no translation! It brings out nationalism, and pride for country, too. Speaking of that... when I was growing up through the 1980's the thought was one nation, under God, and uniformity. So my mom, bless her soul, refused to teach Tagalog or Visayan to my sister and I. As we rolled into the 1990's though, the societal pendulum swung the other direction to return to your roots. So identify with your cultural heredity, then fiercely protect it. At least be loud and proud of it. My vain attempt to start learning a new language fell short as my mother simply didn't know how to accommodate our

SIFF Move Review - The One I Love

SPOILER ALERT!! [Yes, right from the beginning]   ‘The One I Love’ is a film that I loved to be the one and only mind f**k I want to watch over and over to pick up new details that I missed on the first viewing.   The film opens with Ethan (Duplass) and Sophie (Moss) seemingly at the end of their rope in couples therapy – a nod of acknowledgement to Mr. & Mrs. Smith . The spark they once had is gone, they can’t remember the last time they had sex and, as Sophie shares with their therapist (Ted Danson), happiness has become something they have to re-create from memories of a better past. Instead of the off-camera voice of William Fichtner, it’s the on-camera Ted Danson.   But even these early scenes hint at something strange at work, as the therapy sessions alternate between what appear to be two different timelines, complete with different wardrobes and slightly different hairstyles for Ethan and Sophie.   The story ramps up with the ‘foreplay’ of this mind f**k

Eternal Blue, Forever Green

I’ve written and posted several times the back story on Sounders season tickets were introduced to WCP and I. However, I have yet to post the impact that it had on me all these years later. Until now, of course J   Microwave version: I’ve converted to the ECS – Eternal Blue, Forever Green. There. Now you can continue to scroll through your FB Newsfeed and not know what the hell I’m talking about when I reference this material in future posts. J   War and Peace version: I didn’t start off life as a soccer fan, let alone a Seattle area soccer fan. I’ve tried out a few times during my middle-school, high school, days – all ending with “thanks but have a good day”. I even tried my hand in my 30’s to be part of a Redmond co-ed soccer team – we were around for one season, Costco Travel Shooters.   So when WCP (Charrina Bayne) looked at her season tickets for the Seattle Sounders 2010 season, then looked at me, then the tickets, and quipped, “I can’t wait for our first match!”,

Vancouver Away Match – So Laminated On The Neagle Bus

Vancouver Away Match – So Laminated On The Neagle Bus By Carlos Bayne Ever since the Friends episode that aired with the laminated list, I’ve had a laminated list.  [See Friends, Season 3, Episode 5, The One with Frank Jr] And really, an interest in lamination. Fast forward to my 2 nd away match with the Emerald City Supporters, which now will be referred to as the ECS on May 24 th 2014 to Vancouver, British Columbia. My little sister, Charrina Bayne, which now will be referred only was West Coast Playa (WCP), invited a couple of bros and myself. Based on my experience last time she invited me back, and the ECS would welcome me back anytime I can figure it out. I gathered up my gear, save for my beloved, coveted SSFC scarf. Why? Because I know myself, and I know in my heart of hearts that it’ll get damaged, lost, or stolen. All results I didn’t want so I brought a replacement item that if lost, no big loss – my laminated sign of “Scarfs Up” / “Give Us Your Full 90”. O